Episode Recap
One morning in the Coopers’ kitchen, Mary reminds George and Meemaw that it’s Sheldon’s database launch day so they should all be excited. George wonders how excited they’re supposed to be on a scale of 1-10. About a six, Mary suggests. After Meemaw asks if anyone knows what this data thing means, Mary replies “Not a clue”. After Sheldon comes in, Mary asks if she can get him breakfast. Sheldon isn’t sure if he can eat, saying he’s too excited. After Missy asks what’s going on, Mary explains it’s Sheldon’s big day. “When isn’t it?”, Missy retorts. Sheldon asks Meemaw if she’s coming to his party. Meemaw says she wouldn’t miss it, but she will make her own way there as she has something to take care of. George wonders what’s going to happen at this party. “We're gonna post to UseNet that the database is live and then watch the monitor as the subscribers roll in.”, Sheldon explains. “And you're calling that a party? Bold.”, says Missy.
Over at Meemaw’s, a heavily pregnant Mandy sits on the bed as Georgie assembles the crib. After Georgie points out they still haven’t settled on a baby name, Mandy suggests Alice. “Alice Cooper”, Georgie repeats, saying it’s badass. Mandy questions why he thinks the baby’s surname will be Cooper. Georgie points out that it’s his name and he’s the father, so it’s kind of the rule. “Not my rule”, Mandy tells him. Georgie decides not to argue as he’s pretty sure the baby can hear them. After Mandy thanks Georgie for all he’s doing, he responds “You make a whole human being in your belly, I get the crib and car seat, we'll call it even.” Mandy insists it’s not even close to even.
When Brenda Sparks stops by Mary’s office at the bowling alley, Mary says she didn’t think Brenda was working today. It is Brenda’s day off, she’s just there to collect her pay check. Mary has her check right there. Mary asks if Brenda’s got anything planned for her day off, perhaps seeing her mystery man. “Just give me my check.”, Brenda tells her. Mary insists she doens’t mean to pry, it’s just Brenda’s friends think the man is being kept secret because he’s married. Brenda insists there’s no man, and Mary is prying. When Mary’s phone rings, she answers and says hello to Rob. “Pastor Rob”, she corrects herself. Mary says lunch will be fine and agrees to see to see him soon. After Mary gets off the phone, Brenda asks if she should pry. Mary insists it’s nothing, just church gossip. “Here’s your check. Bye.”, Mary says to hurry Brenda away.
At a baby goods store, Georgie asks the salesperson, Bruce, for the best car seat but winces at the top-end model's price. Bruce tries to sway Georgie with scary talk about newborns' fragility and the nerve-wracking first drive home from the hospital. Being a salesman himself, Georgie recognizes Bruce's tactics. Nevertheless, he ultimately chooses the pricey car seat.
As Sheldon sits on the couch, the phone rings. Mandy asks if Georgie is there. No, Sheldon responds. Is his mom there? No. Are there any adults there? No, Sheldon says, but he points out his IQ is 187, so he’s sure he can figure out whatever’s troubling her. “My water broke. I'm in labor.”, Mandy reveals. “Oh, dear.”, Sheldon says.
After Sheldon knocks on the door at Meemaw’s house, Mandy tells him to come in. Mandy wonders why he’s wearing dish gloves. “To deliver the baby.”, he explains. Sheldon is relieved when Mandy says that’s not happening. When Mandy points out she has to go to the hospital, Sheldon admits he doesn’t drive. He has a bicycle but there’s no way she’ll fit in the wagon. A desperate Mandy says she’ll drive, but asks Sheldon to come with her. Mandy groans as she stands up and heads for the door. Sheldon tells Mandy he’ll be right back. Across the street, Brenda Sparks opens the door to Sheldon, who explains he needs her help. “What’s with the gloves?”, Brenda inquires. “So I don't get placenta on my hands.”, he explains. “What?!”, Brenda asks.
At a diner, Mary and Pastor Rob catch up after not seeing each other for a while. Pastor Rob is busy trying to manage things at their church, which has been more chaotic than usual since Mary's departure. Rob reveals that he received a job offer from a church in Little Rock, Arkansas, but is torn about the decision. It's a good opportunity with a larger congregation, but he would miss the children and the friends he's made at their current church. Things take a personal turn when Mary inquires about the girl Pastor Rob was seeing, the one Mary once babysat for. After Pastor Rob reveals that they have broken up, Mary expresses her sympathy. When Pastor Rob asks Mary for advice on his situation, Mary admits she would miss having him around, but tells Rob to follow his heart.
As Sheldon and Brenda Sparks stay with Mandy in her hospital room, Mandy is pacing around the bed. After Sheldon wonders if she should by lying down, Mandy says it’s good for her to be on her feet, and the doctor said this could take hours. Sheldon wants her to be more specific as he has a thing at 5. Brenda asks Mandy if there’s anyone else she could call, maybe her mom? Mandy says she can’t deal with her mother right now, maybe after they give her drugs. As Brenda steps out to try phone the Coopers again, Sheldon tells a groaning Mandy they are having similar days. “Really? How might that be?”, Mandy wonders. Sheldon explains, “I'm also bringing something new into the world. Although mine does not involve my privates being inspected my strangers.” Mandy lets out another groan and a bitter chuckle. Meanwhile, the phones at the Cooper house ring without answer. Outside the Cooper house, Georgie attempts to fit the car seat without success, while the phone keeps ringing inside.
As Sheldon and Brenda sit in the hospital waiting room, Sheldon asks her how long deliveries usually take. “Depends.”, she answers, “With Billy it was days.” “Well, he always has been a tad slow.”, Sheldon says. Brenda nods along in agreement.
When George arrives at the hospital, he’s worried that he's late. Brenda tells him he's actually the first one there. Eager to leave, Sheldon points out he was actually the first. After George asks who’s with Mandy, Brenda mentions she’s with the doctor in private. Sheldon explains they can’t get a hold of Georgie, and Brenda says Mary is out at lunch without mentioning who she is with. Sheldon is impatient to go to his launch, but George is determined to stay for his granddaughter's birth. After Sheldon suggests that George will have other chances as Georgie might get more women pregnant, George tells him to walk away.
After Sheldon walks away, Brenda tells George she’s gonna go now. George asks her to stay and keep him company, so Brenda relents and they sit down together. When Brenda asks if he remembers the last time they were there, George jokes that it was “the night you almost gave me a heart attack”. Brenda giggles and insists she did not give him a heart attack. “Well, you gave me something.”, George says. Their conversation is interrupted when Mary arrives, surprised to see the two of them together. When Mary asks what’s going on, a defensive George responds, “Nothing. What's going on with you?” Mary wonders who’s with Mandy, so George explains she’s with the doctor. After Mary asks what George and Brenda were doing, George says waiting on you and asks his wife where she’s been. Mary says she was at lunch. Pastor Rob then walks in, saying he heard they’re having a baby. Mary, George and Brenda share an awkward silence.
As Missy and Billy wait outside their otherwise deserted high school, Missy wonders where her dad is. Billy says he wonders that a lot, too. Missy insists her dad isn’t usually late, but Billy admits his mom is often late picking him up. “Hey, maybe they’re together.”, Billy says. “Why would they be together?”, Missy asks, uncomfortable at the suggestion. “They could be having another secret meeting in the chicken coop.”, Billy argues. Missy insists her dad is probably just running late at practice. “Okay.”, Billy concedes. “I'm sure they're not together.”, Missy says. “Okay.”, Billy repeats. As Billy keeps saying “Okay.” without elaborating, Missy tells him to shut up.
In the hospital waiting room, there’s tension between George and Mary over Pastor Rob's presence. George questions Mary about her lunch with Pastor Rob, insinuating there’s something more going on, leading to an argument. Brenda Sparks tries to leave but George insists she stay. "No, he's staying, you're staying," George tells Brenda. After Mary asks what's going on between George and Brenda, George dismisses her question and turns it back on Mary and Pastor Rob. Sheldon returns to offer them one last chance to "witness science history" but is met with a stony silence. Back home, Georgie finds nine new messages on the answering machine and is shocked by the news. He rushes to the car, Scotch-tapes the baby seat in, and hot tails it to the hospital.
At the hospital, Mandy is surprised to run into Meemaw, emerging from a bathroom and in a hospital gown. When Meemaw asks what she’s doing there, Mandy points to her belly and says she’s having the baby. Mandy wonders why Meemaw is there, but Meemaw will only say it was a medical thing that’s been taken care off. She tries to switch the subject and help Mandy to her room. What kind of thing, Mandy presses. Just a thing, Meemaw insists, and asks Mandy about her contractions. “Connie, what’s going on?”, Mandy inquires. “It's hemorrhoids, okay?”, Meemaw admits, “It's embarrassing, but here we are. Hemorrhoids, hemorrhoids, hemorrhoids! Happy?” After Meemaw’s outburst, Mandy explains she’s four centimeteres dilated and the doctors think it could be a few hours yet. As Meemaw walks Mandy back to her room, Meemaw tells her to walk slowly.
In the waiting room, George asks Pastor Rob how often he’s taking his wife out to lunch. Mary insists he didn’t take her out, and it was just lunch. When Sheldon returns to ask who’s going to drive him home, George says not now and Mary sends him to check on Mandy. Mary accuses George of being ridiculous. “Am I? I’ve got eyes, Mary.”, George tells her. “So do I.”, Mary says, as she claims George and Brenda were acting weird when she got there. George and Brenda insist it’s nothing, but Mary’s suspicions are piqued. After Mary asks Brenda if George is her “mystery man”, George says Brenda’s dating someone else, she told him. Mary questions why Brenda is speaking to her husband about her love life. Brenda warns Mary to be careful throwing stones, because she’s seen her glass house. Brenda saw how upset Mary was when Pastor Rob was on a date. “Really?”, Pastor Rob asks, attracting George’s ire. As Audrey and Jim arrive during thiss argument, Audrey wonders why they’re all out here bickering and not with Mandy. Mary insists Mandy’s fine in her room, and George adds at Sheldon’s with her. “Unbelievable”, Audrey says before heading off to see Mandy, and making sure husband Jim follows behind her.
Outside the high school, Missy has finally had enough and sets off walking home, telling Billy their parents clearly forgot about them. “Do you think my mom and your dad are going to be boyfriend and girlfriend?”, Billy asks. “No.”, Missy responds. “If they got married, would that make us brother and sister?”, Billy wonders. “It’s not going to happen.”, Missy insists. After Billy mentions that Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia were brother and sister, and they still kissed, Missy comes to a halt and scoffs at Billy’s inappropriate suggestion. “I didn’t write it.”, Billy tells her. Missy scoffs again and keeps walking.
Sheldon goes to the hospital front desk to ask the receptionist, Rhonda, if the hospital has a modem. “A what?”, she queries. Sheldon tries to describe it, helpfully imitating the dial-up modem noises. “You mean a fax machine?” she asks. “It’s like I’m from the future.”, Sheldon says as he gives up and walks away. As he passes by the entrance, he sees Georgie sitting outside the hospital. Sheldon goes and asks his older brother why he’s here. Georgie explains he heard Mandy was having the baby. Sheldon points out that happens inside and asks his brother if he’s coming in. “I can’t.”, Georgie says. “I can't be a dad. I couldn't even install a car seat.”, Georgie explains. Sheldon doesn’t exactly hear his brother’s concern, as he declares Georgie is free to drive him to his launch party.
Mandy’s parents, Jim and Audrey, are at her bedside as Meemaw stands at the foot of the bed. As Jim tries to give encouraging support to Mandy, Audrey says it didn’t work 30 years ago and isn’t working now. Meemaw offers to leave them to it, but Mandy asks her to stay. When Mary comes to check if Mandy is fine, Mandy says she is and wonders if Mary is fine. Audrey scoffs at the idea Mary is fine, claiming it looked like her husband was about to hit someone. After Meemaw asks what happened, Mary wonders when her mother got there. “Earlier.”, Meemaw says without elaborating. “So, who did George almost punch?”, she asks. “Some little fella with a mustache.”, Jim answers. As Mary flashes an ashamed look to her mother, Mandy groans with another contraction. Jim tells her to hang in there, she’s doing great. “What did I just say?”, Audrey asks her husband. “I don’t know what else to say,” Jim admits.
As Georgie drives Sheldon home, Sheldon thanks his brother for doing this. “Mmmhmm”, an absent-minded Georgie replies. “You know, you wait and you wait and you wait, and you think the day's never gonna come, and then pow, it's here.”, Sheldon says of his database. “I know.”, Georgie says. “Everyone thought I was too young, that I wouldn't see it through, but here I am. To think I almost missed it. I would have regretted that for the rest of my life.”, Sheldon tells his brother. Sheldon is confused when Georgie turns the car around.
When an angry-looking George goes into Mandy’s room, Mary avoids eye contact with him. After Mandy asks what’s going on between him and Mary, George insists they’re fine. “You know what, if you're gonna fight, can you do it out loud? 'Cause I could really use the distraction.”, Mandy tells them. Audrey thinks Mandy is getting close, and says she will go into the delivery room with her since the father is not here. Knowing Mandy’s strained relationship with her mother, Meemaw offers to go instead. Mary insists Georgie will be here. “If he were gonna be here, he'd be here. But honestly, who's surprised?”, Audrey says. Jim admits he is surprised, prompting Audrey to claim he never takes her side. Jim points out he missed his daughter’s whole pregnancy because he took his wife’s side. “So you're just, you're just okay with all of this?”, Audrey wonders. Jim says his daughter’s having a baby, he’s thrilled. After Georgie finally arrives, he says he’s sorry he’s late. Jim insists Georgie’s right on time. Mandy tells Georgie he’s completely late, but she’s glad he’s there. When Georgie asks if she wants all these people around, Mandy says no, so Georgie sternly sends them all on their way. After Georgie asks how Mandy’s doing, she wonders where he was. Georgie explains he was trying to fit the car seat, and he didn’t hear the phone. “It's okay, you made it.”, Mandy tells him before asking, “Did you get it installed?” Georgie says no, but Sheldon did. Turns out it takes a genius.
Later that night, Georgie, wearing a protective gown, returns to the waiting room with the news. “She's here. She's tiny and perfect, and Mandy's doing great.”, he tells everyone. George shakes his son’s hand, while Mary pulls her son in for a hug. When Mary asks what the baby’s name is, Georgie says “Constance.” An overwhelmed Meemaw hugs Georgie and thanks him. When Jim asks if they can see Mandy and the baby, Georgie says they’re both asleep now but he’ll let them know. When Jim congratulates Audrey on being a grandmother, Audrey’s chilly demeanour disappears and she cries with happiness. As Jim and Audrey walk off, George and Mary can barely look at each other. Mary tells him she’s staying at her mom’s house tonight. “Fine by me.”, George says. An ashen Sheldon returns to say he just talked to Dr. Sturgis and their database didn’t get a single subscriber. It’s a complete failure. Mary averts her watery eyes while a somber George looks down at the ground. “I know, I'm upset, too.”, Sheldon says. After Meemaw wonders where Missy is, George looks at his watch.
