Sheldon Quotes

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Meemaw: Hey, Moonpie. I got you a little something to help you get over your fear of animals.
Sheldon: A tranquilizer gun?

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Meemaw: Well, I thought you could start small and then work your way up. Look, he's kind of cute.
Sheldon: He doesn't even care that I'm here. I like him.

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Mary: What are you gonna name him?
Sheldon: Fish.
Mary: Fish?
Sheldon: I'm not ready to get attached.

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Missy: Fish are kind of boring.
Sheldon: I know, isn't it great?

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Sheldon: [on the phone with a veterinary practice] Yes, hello? Oh, that's too bad. How about a small fluffy one that's recently died of old age?

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Sheldon: Excuse me, Ms. Hutchins?
Ms. Hutchins: Hey, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Can you recommend any books on overcoming phobias?
Ms. Hutchins: That's in the self-help section. Follow me, I have read them all. Any phobia in particular?
Sheldon: Dogs.
Ms. Hutchins: Ah, cynophobia. That's a good one. Did you know there's over 50 million dogs just in the United States alone?
Sheldon: That's 50 million too many.

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Sheldon: Hello, I'd like to speak with the veterinarian. Well, I was hoping you might have one or two dogs under anesthesia that I might come by and pet. Sure, I'll hold.

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Mary: Why didn't you call for help?
Sheldon: I tried, but no sound came out.
Mary: You poor thing.
Sheldon: It was very dirty up there. Is cleaning the garage your job or Dad's?

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Meemaw: Here, have some tea.
Sheldon: Chamomile?
Meemaw: Yes.
Sheldon: One teaspoon of honey?
Meemaw: Yes.
Sheldon: An ice cube to cool it off?
Meemaw: I went with two today. You've been through enough.
Sheldon: [drinking] I prefer one ice cube.
Meemaw: Drink it.

Quote from the episode A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish

Missy: Who are you? You're so cute.
Sheldon: [weakly] Be careful.
Missy: What are you doing up there?
Sheldon: Staying alive.