Missy Quotes
Quote from the episode A Box of Treasure and the Meemaw of Science
Missy: I think Pastor Jeff and Mrs. Sparks might be talking about Billy.
Mary: What's going on with Billy?
Missy: He's been getting in trouble at school.
Mary: How is that fun?
Missy: It's gossip. Gossip's fun.
Mary: [sighs] Poor thing. Brenda did say he was having trouble adjusting. Maybe I should see if she's doing okay later.
George Sr.: Great idea. [to Missy] I'm not walking, good job.
Quote from the episode A Box of Treasure and the Meemaw of Science
Missy: Whatcha looking at?
Mary: Uh, just Pastor Jeff and Mrs. Sparks.
Missy: They were out there the other day, too.
Mary: Oh.
Missy: How come you don't go with them?
Mary: They didn't invite me.
Missy: Ouch. Rough start to your day.
Quote from the episode A Pager, a Club and a Cranky Bag of Wrinkles
Sheldon: Missy, has your social experience in middle school been going well?
Missy: So good, it's nuts.
Sheldon: Are you a member of any clubs?
Missy: Well, in the cafeteria, we call our table Heather M. and the Funky Lunch Bunch.
Sheldon: Well, I meant school-sanctioned clubs.
Missy: The F.L.B. is a pretty big deal.
Quote from the episode A Pager, a Club and a Cranky Bag of Wrinkles
Missy: Wil Wheaton's cute.
Sheldon: If you like him, then you should watch Star Trek with me.
Missy: He's not that cute.
Quote from the episode Crappy Frozen Ice Cream and an Organ Grinder's Monkey
[Missy is about to climb out her bedroom window]
Mary: [at her door] Missy?
Missy: Go away. I'm not talking to you.
Mary: I know you're mad. But I've been thinking about it, and... I trust you enough to know that you will behave yourself. So, just this once, you can go.
Missy: Thanks, Mom. Love you. [climbs back inside]
Mary: [door rattles] Why won't this open?
Missy: Sometimes it sticks!
Quote from the episode Crappy Frozen Ice Cream and an Organ Grinder's Monkey
Missy: "David danced before the Lord with all his might, leaping and dancing before the Lord." Leaping and dancing.
Mary: I'm impressed.
Missy: Thank you.
Mary: Too bad it's from Footloose.
Missy: [giggles] What's a footloose?
Mary: It is the movie that Pastor Jeff warned us about in his talk on the Sins of Cinema.
Missy: Just let me go to the dance.
Mary: I'm sorry. I can't.
Missy: I'm never talking to you again!
Quote from the episode Crappy Frozen Ice Cream and an Organ Grinder's Monkey
Missy: So, there's this thing at school I really want to go to, and before you say no, I just want you to think about it.
Mary: What is it?
Missy: Like a school function.
Mary: Why would I say no to a school function?
Missy: So I can go? You're the best.
Mary: Hold on. What kind of function are we talking about?
Missy: You know, just the normal kind. With some kids. And some music.
Mary: You know you can't go to a dance.
Missy: Why not?
Mary: You know that, too. Because we're Baptist.
Missy: But all my friends are going.
Mary: That doesn't change anything.
Missy: What if I promise not to dance?
Mary: So you expect me to believe that you are going to go to a dance with your friends, they'll all be dancing while you just stand there?
Missy: I go to church and don't pray. How is this any different?
Quote from the episode An Existential Crisis and a Bear That Makes Bubbles
[Sheldon sits on the top of the couch with his feet on the cushion]
Missy: What are you doing?
Sheldon: I'm practicing the philosophy of cynicism... The ancient Greek view that the rules of society should be ignored.
Missy: If you're gonna break rules, you can do better than that.
Sheldon: How?
[Missy pushes Sheldon off the couch]
Quote from the episode An Existential Crisis and a Bear That Makes Bubbles
George Sr.: I talked to him. Where is your mother?
Missy: She had to leave for work.
George Sr.: I have to work, too.
Missy: You also get to take me to school.
George Sr.: What am I supposed to do about your brother?
Missy: Call me old-fashioned, but I say spank him.
George Sr.: Your mom won't let me.
Quote from the episode A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
Missy: But I want to watch Fresh Prince.
George Jr.: Too bad. The game is on.
Missy: There's always a game on. Dad?
George Sr.: Sorry, kid, it's the Cowboys.
Missy: But it's the season premiere. Fresh Prince's family gets tickets to the People's Choice Awards. I'm not missing it.
Quote from the episode A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
Missy: That's the Fresh Prince. He's from West Philadelphia. Born and raised.
Quote from the episode A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
Missy: And in math class, I sit right between Heather M. and Heather B.
Mary: It's nice you're with your friends.
Missy: It's more than nice. All notes go through me. That's power.
Quote from the episode A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
Mary: Sheldon, good news. Dr. Linkletter was calling to say that while you're at school, if you need anything, you can go to him.
Missy: Starting college and you need a babysitter. That's funny.
Sheldon: I don't need a babysitter.
Mary: Dr. Linkletter is just around in case there's a problem.
George Jr.: Like if he needs a new diaper?
Missy: Ha!
George Sr.: Enough.
Mary: Can we please have a nice dinner?
Missy: We could. But you're the one who wants to eat as a family.
George Sr.: [to Mary] Don't pray for any of 'em.
Quote from the episode A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
Mary: I figure you don't want me to walk you in?
Missy: I've trained you well.
Mary: Do you have everything you need? Lunch money?
Missy: Yep.
Mary: Locker combination?
Missy: [pulls down sock] Right here.
Mary: Why is it there?
Missy: Writing on my hand is so fifth grade.
Mary: Of course.
Missy: Okay, I'm gonna go in.
Mary: I assume you don't want a hug?
Missy: Make it quick. [they hug] That's enough.
Mary: Okay.
Missy: Wish me luck.
Mary: Good luck.
Quote from the episode Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of the Zipper
Missy: Will this make me look older?
Meemaw: Definitely.
Missy: But not like you older, right?
Meemaw: Right.
Quote from the episode Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of the Zipper
Missy: What do you think?
Meemaw: I think you're gonna be a little heartbreaker.
Missy: I don't want to break anyone's heart. I just want to look hot.
Meemaw: Well, that you do.
Missy: Thank you.
Quote from the episode Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of the Zipper
Meemaw: What?
Missy: You said you'd show me how to hot-roll my hair.
Meemaw: Oh, right. You still want to do that?
Missy: You're cranky.
Meemaw: So maybe I shouldn't be putting hot rollers on your head.
Missy: Meh, you're always cranky. Let's do this.
Quote from the episode Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of the Zipper
Missy: I feel like this cover really says who I am now.
Sheldon: That looks like all your notebooks.
Missy: Missy got ponies. Melissa gets horses.
Quote from the episode Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of the Zipper
Mary: Missy, don't forget that you have to pick out a present for that birthday next week.
Missy: Mom, it's "Melissa" now.
Mary: [to Brenda] Middle school.
Quote from the episode A Musty Crypt and a Stick to Pee On
[fantasy:]
Meemaw: Get out of my way. I'm a thief, and I'm opening this chest.
Dale: Have at it. I'm a paladin with a buzz on.
[reality:]
Sheldon: Success. The chest opens, revealing a scroll with ancient writing in a strange language you don't recognize. What do you do?
Missy: I say this is boring...
[fantasy:]
Missy: ...and turn myself into a Ninja Turtle Princess of Power.
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles... ♪
Missy: This game just got good. High five.
Dale: Yeah.
♪ Heroes in a half-shell, turtle power. ♪
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