Latest Quotes

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Meemaw: I think your anger might be a little misdirected.
Mary: Don't you start with me either.
Meemaw: Now, see, you're still shootin' wide.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Mary: Shelly, time to get ready for bed.
Sheldon: But I'm not done.
Mary: Don't you sass me, too, young man. Brush your teeth and get to bed.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Meemaw: Hey! There's my little Moonpie. Did you get a chance to look at this week's games for me?
Sheldon: Not yet.
Meemaw: You understand there's a little time crunch involved? Meemaw's got some outstanding loans I need to pay back.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, I have to finish my homework and then I have to help my dad.
Meemaw: Come on. I'm your meemaw. I make you cookies. How 'bout a little quid pro quo?
Sheldon: As much as I enjoy your use of Latin, no.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Mary: Georgie, turn that down!
George Jr.: What?
Mary: (turns off the music) And look at this room. You need to clean this mess up.
George Jr.: I'll get to it later.
Mary: No, you'll get to it now.
George Jr.: I don't feel like it.
Mary: Well, your feelings have nothing to do with it. And stop throwing that ball.
George Jr.: My room bothers you so much, you clean it.
Mary: That's it! You are grounded!

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: It's solar-powered. Can you imagine that?

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: I got you a present. Thought it might help with your figures.
Sheldon: I don't need a calculator, Dad. I am one.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: You have any more, uh, arithmetic ideas for next week's game?
Sheldon: I do, but I'm trying to finish my homework.
George Sr.: Ah. Looks complicated.
Sheldon: Advanced chemistry. It's not.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Sheldon: Well, I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Tam: You're not?
Sheldon: I was touched 82 times this afternoon.
Tam: What do you mean, "touched"?
Sheldon: Not inappropriately. Joyfully. Affectionately. A cheerleader hugged me to her bosom.
Tam: That's amazing. [goes to high five Sheldon]
Sheldon: No more high fives. I can't keep washing my hands.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Tam: Hey, I've been looking all over for you. Do you know how popular we are?
Sheldon: We?
Tam: Yeah. I put the word out I was helping you with the football stats. And since I'm Asian, they bought it.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Adult Sheldon: For the next five weeks, I continued to help my father apply statistics to coach his team. Not surprisingly, they continued to win, which changed my status in the school dramatically. It was a nightmare. Hugging, hair tousling, high fives. And as my popularity grew, so did my time aloft.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: I got something for you.
Sheldon: It's dirty.
George Sr.: Well, that's 'cause it's the game ball. And you earned it, 'cause you helped us win.
Sheldon: Okay, but can you wash it?
Mary: Sheldon, your daddy's telling you he's proud of you.
Sheldon: I see. Thank you, Dad.
George Sr.: You're welcome.
Sheldon: I'm still never touching that.
Mary: Let's go wipe it off.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Missy: Mom said you're not supposed to gamble.
Meemaw: Sleep, child!

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Meemaw: Can I ask you a favor?
Sheldon: Sure. What?
Meemaw: You know those statistics that you were talking about with your dad? Could could that be applied to, say, who might win the Cowboys-Packers game next week? And, more specifically, by how much?
Sheldon: I suppose with enough data I could make a reasonable guess.
Meemaw: I don't want a guess, I want to know.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Mary: (to the guy who doubted Sheldon's tactics) Oh, booyah!

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Assistant Coach Wilkins: I never had any doubt, Coach. Never had any doubt.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: Remind me to tell you about the tax refund I got from the IRS.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Gerome: Your little boy's a real genius.
Mary: Well, actually he is.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Gerome: What the hell? Punt!
Mary: Statistically, they're better off going for it.
Gerome: Says who?
Mary: My little boy.

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

George Sr.: Let's go for it.
Assistant Coach Wilkins: Why? We got plenty of time.
George Sr.: I know. Still want to go for it.
Assistant Coach Wilkins: We're on the 12-yard line. Everybody know you punt.
George Sr.: Why does everybody knowing something make it right?

Quote from the episode A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom

Adult Sheldon: Many years later, my brother would use this same argument in front of a judge. He was still convicted for urinating in a phone booth.